Did I just sell out?
So, I just created my myspace profile. I am not sure how I feel about it, yet. Thankfully, I don't need to make any major decisions about it immediately.
I want to be more connected right now, I crave a community that I don't have to constantly entertain. I have a hot/cold desire to get in touch with those that I spent my child and adolescent days with. I ache for the smells of the first morning of summer vacation: fresh cut grass, lilacs, and fruity pebbles. I miss the first days of high school when what was worn on the first day dictated your place in the popularity hierarchy; I have great style, but was never popular. I wonder what that means.
What I find most disconcerting about my creating a myspace profile is that while I will be electronically connecting to old friends, I will be missing real opportunities to live this life, my life. Can both actions be done? I am sure; but I am compulsive and obsessive, and above all I am a homebody. This combination does not bode well for me to do anything but become a myspace addict; an addict that will need more than a twelve step program to give up layout designs, groups, and high school alums, among other myspace staples.
Yet, after I have created my myspace page I am blogging; something I haven't done in a while. Maybe this myspace thing won't be so bad. After all, I get to see pictures of my beautiful sister, keep tabs on my fabulous roommate, and catch up with fellow goddard grads. I think there will be many surprises in store. And if not, nothing was lost.
I want to be more connected right now, I crave a community that I don't have to constantly entertain. I have a hot/cold desire to get in touch with those that I spent my child and adolescent days with. I ache for the smells of the first morning of summer vacation: fresh cut grass, lilacs, and fruity pebbles. I miss the first days of high school when what was worn on the first day dictated your place in the popularity hierarchy; I have great style, but was never popular. I wonder what that means.
What I find most disconcerting about my creating a myspace profile is that while I will be electronically connecting to old friends, I will be missing real opportunities to live this life, my life. Can both actions be done? I am sure; but I am compulsive and obsessive, and above all I am a homebody. This combination does not bode well for me to do anything but become a myspace addict; an addict that will need more than a twelve step program to give up layout designs, groups, and high school alums, among other myspace staples.
Yet, after I have created my myspace page I am blogging; something I haven't done in a while. Maybe this myspace thing won't be so bad. After all, I get to see pictures of my beautiful sister, keep tabs on my fabulous roommate, and catch up with fellow goddard grads. I think there will be many surprises in store. And if not, nothing was lost.
posted by amandakate at 7:57 PM
2 Comments:
So Amanda its funny you say did I sell out. I go to my space ocassionally trying to figure out is it really a friendly community? Well I ran accross you and decided to come to your page as I knew you back in highschool. Hi, its Tara if you remember. You are an amazing writer and have tons to say. I took some time to read what you have been up to/through and it has been a long and bumpy ride but it seems as if you are taking it all a day at a time just as you did in school. As far as perfection wow I think it must have been in Manitous water as I know you definately aren't the only one trying to let go of the perfect picture we all try to paint. As far as selling out of course you didn't you have many things to teach many people and why not show off your wonderful family and beautiful smile! I hope you are doing well and look forward to visiting your site!
Tara,
Of course I remember you, thank you for your kind words. It is a crazy ride this life. I am honored that you would even consider coming back here. Thanks!
Amanda
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